A first date can be extremely nerve-racking for many people, we have constructed a list of 10 first date rules and tips to help make the experience that bit easier and more relaxed.
Tip 1: Put thought into the location and activity
Many women out there prefer the man to select what to do on a first date, it provides them with a greater insight into the type of person he is. Therefore, I am mainly talking to the guys here. When deciding on what to do on a first date, give great consideration to what your date would like to do. Is she the adventurous type or a bit more contemporary? There is little point in taking a woman who is not very adventurous for a day at paintball or rock climbing at the local leisure centre. Yes both of those have been chosen as first date options before. You want your date to not only enjoy your company but also the date itself. If you both clearly do not enjoy the setting you are in, the date has already started off poorly.
Tip 2: Choose the correct clothing
Choosing the correct attire for a date is extremely important. First impressions in this situation mean a lot. Now, I know we all say “don’t jude a book by its cover”, but many of us do, and that is why the type of clothing we wear on a first date is something that needs to be considered with thought. Obviously, the type of clothing you wear depends on where the date is. For example if you are the adventurous type and your first date is something like, say, go-karting, it is probably not a great idea to turn up in a suit for you lads or an expensive designer dress if your a woman. If in doubt about your outfit for a first date, a quick and safe solution is to dress smart casual. For guys, that means perhaps a collard shirt and some jeans with fairly smart shoes. Make sure your colour choices do not clash either. Again, if in doubt, a solution is that black goes with almost anything. The main thing to remember is dress for the occasion/location. You CAN overdress!
Tip 3: Be on time
This sounds extremely obvious but there are a number of us who do not have the best time management skills. Unless something serious has happened which causes you to be late for a date then there really is no excuse not to be on time. Many people offer one chance and one chance only when it comes to dating, if you are late, chances are you wont be seeing that person again as they will most likely already be in a bad mood once you arrive.
Tip 4: Mobile Phone stays away
There are little more irritating things to occur when your having a conversation with someone and they are texting on their phone. It shows that they are clearly uninterested in what you have to say and would probably rather be somewhere else. Therefore, if your serious about your first date, keep that phone switched off and in your pocket or bag.
Tip 5: Have a good conversation
The main thing you want to get out of a first date is to see whether you and the other person are compatible; do you share similar interests etc? Try not talk too much, you do not want to come across as self obsessed. Ask the other person questions. The conversation will become much more free flowing and relaxed if you pay attention to what the other person is saying and are able to ask them appropriate questions or even, perhaps better, to relate to what they are saying through your own prior experiences. After all, the main aim of a first date is to identify common interests.
Tip 6: It is ok to flirt
Many people on a first date, perhaps due to nerves, well actually definitely due to nerves, do not relax and partake in a bit of harmless flirting. You are not having a casual get together with a friend, you are on a date. Feel free to pay your date some compliment, do not be to extreme though. For example, try not to tell a girl that she has great breasts etc. A good way to think when looking to compliment someone on their looks is to focus on above the neck. Eyes or hair would be a good place to start, or even complimenting their laugh, many people are conscious about their laugh so it would help to complement them on that. Everyone loves to be complimented so don’t worry about coming on too strong by paying your date a couple of compliments. Not too many though! Compliments are good gateway into flirting. There are not really any great tips to give in relation to flirting as everyone does it differently. Anyone can flirt, just relax and go with the flow, feed off what the other person says.
Tip 7: Paying the bill
This is something that a lot of men worry about prior to and during a date. We no longer live in a time where men have to pay the bill all the time, but I would suggest that on a first date that the man picks up the tab (and just so you know, this is not a woman writing). It leaves a good impression and can only go in your favour. As a result, when selecting the location of a date, have your budgets in mind. Girls, its nice for you to offer to go half on the bill, but if the man says he is fine paying, just let him. A coffee shop is an ideal location for a date when considering the bill as it should be quite affordable.
Tip 8: Put a restriction on your time
Duration of a date is another thing that needs to be considered, you do not want it to be too short or go on so long that you run out of things to say (although if you are compatible, discussion topics shouldn’t be lacking). A good idea is to set some sort of time limit before the date. I would recommend 45 minutes as being a good time for a first date. When arranging a date simply say that you need to leave by a certain time due to meeting friends, having an appointment etc. That way you are not going to be sitting there thinking about when an appropriate time is to leave.
Tip 9: Work out how you are both getting to the location
Whilst some people like to give their date a lift to and from the location, it is not essential. It is ok to simply arrange to meet at a certain time and place. For the guys, if your date has made her own way there using public transport, another polite thing to do just to make yourself look good is to offer to pay for a taxi home. This way you are ensuring that she is getting home safe and also give off that caring vibe.
Tip 10: A kiss is not essential on a first date
The conclusion of a date to some is the most important part. How do you part ways? Do you give a simple kiss on the cheek? Lip lock? or hug? There are countless potential ways to end the date. A kiss is not essential, and is also a risky option. over 50% of people wait until the second or third date before sharing their first kiss. If you wait until then, there is less chance of you being rejected when leaning in for that kiss, as clearly the other person is interested in you having agreed to meet again. So if you do not kiss, how do you end the date? A simple hug is sufficient enough, it shows emotion and that you are attracted to the other person. Whatever you do, do not shake hands with them. You are not in a business meeting, it is far too formal and will likely send off the wrong vibe to your date.